Humor
The Elusive Vermont Accent
It’s got something to do with the “a’s” and “r’s.” At least that’s what I think.
I overslept one morning, and so, unable to make my own coffee, I ran into the general store on my way into work. Next to the assortment of Green Mountain Coffee is a large round table where the […]
Choosing the Easier Road
Slipping all over the wet, packed, uneven snow, I rolled to a stop at the pond loop. The sticky snow had been rubbed off my skis during the descent and now I faced the prospect of either a relatively short ski to the Flatlanders trail that lead back to my car or a longer loop […]
Living in Vermont, From the October Newsletter
If you already receive my newsletter, then you’ve had a chance to read the list of changes in my life since moving to Vermont. For those who have not yet seen it, I’m republishing it below along with a few additions at the end. If you enjoy what you read, you can sign up for […]
The Mutable People
Start writing for 20 minutes with the following opening line:
“If the mute button worked on people . . .”
If the mute button worked on people I would put it to good use in cafes, trains, planes, and other public places. Cell phone technology has advanced to the place where even people who shouldn’t have cell […]
Rescued From the Kitchen Sink
I never found profanity tempting until I attempted plumbing. Plumbing is unforgiving, stubborn, and awkward. There is nothing worse than working on something fragile and difficult in close quarters. No wonder plumbers don’t give a second thought to the height of their pants.
Our new home had a nice location, but everything else was either […]
The Scripture Translation Service
UPDATE: The following piece is a humorous satire that is not true.
Living Word Bible Chapel has found a way to use every translation of the Bible at one time during Sunday morning services, a key way of connecting with the broad range of generations in attendance. “We call it the scripture translation service,” shared […]
Incarnation Instant Breakfast
The popularity of low carb diets has caused a sales slump at breakfast giant Sunrise Foods, leading to an exploration of alternative breakfast markets. Incarnation Instant Breakfast is the newest line of breakfast bars from Sunrise targeting the Christian segment of the market.
A doughy breakfast bar with a grape filling, the bar is modeled on […]
The Chronicle of Sally, the Lonely Dental Hygienist
The other day a handsome fellow named Hank came into the office. He was courteous, cheerful, and most importantly “hannnndsome.” I prodded Cecily our receptionist with my pick to let her know that Suzie didn’t have a chance cleaning Hank’s teeth. Hunky Hank will be all mine.
I sat in the hygienist chair gripped in anticipation. […]
How Technology Saved Our Lives
The sun had set. Darkness surrounded us. The blue blazes of an unfamiliar trail were no longer visible and a thick carpet of leaves leant a terrifying uniformity to the ground. We were at best 30-40 minutes from our car.
We fortunately had two items that saved us from a freezing night out in the […]
English Teachers Band Together
I regularly attend a writing group on Tuesday evenings at a local bookstore. During that time we do creative writing exercises. I will be sharing the exercises as well as my own writing here for you to try out.
Writing Exercise: Write about a bracelet that is associated with a cause other than a disease. Allow […]
